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The Benefits of Giving to Yourself and Others During the Grieving Process Grief is messy. There is no one right way to go through it, and it looks different for everyone. But one thing that seems to be consistent is that many people focus on the person they lost when grieving as opposed to focusing […]
Continue ReadingCompanioning is about curiosity; it is not about expertise. by Alan D. Wolfelt, Ph.D. “Real understanding is a creative mixture of certainty and unknowing. The trick is to know when you don’t understand.” -Thomas Moore Curiosity for the companion is about being willing to enter into and learn about the mystery of grief while recognizing you […]
Continue Reading…it is not about teaching them. by Alan D. Wolfelt, Ph.D. “Allow stories to be told without slipping into interpretations, analysis, and conclusions.” Thomas Moore When I attended graduate school in traditional psychology, I learned semantics such as assess, diagnose and treat. In large part, I was taught to study a body of knowledge surrounding […]
Continue Reading…it is not about imposing order and logic. by Alan D. Wolfelt, PhD “Instead of struggling against the force of confusion, we could meet it and relax.” — Pema Chodron The death of someone loved brings about significant change in the life of the mourner. Change of any kind starts with disorder and confusion. Companioning […]
Continue ReadingFor Father’s day, I couldn’t think of a more eloquent statement of love and respect for a father than Meghan’s eulogy of her father–LL Meghan McCain at the National Cathedral, Washington, DC For video, click HERE “The world is a fine place and worth the fighting for, and I hate very much to leave […]
Continue ReadingPlease Don’t Tell me To Move On by Anne Peterson I have a Master’s Degree in grief. Not a real one, but believe me, I should have an honorary one. And one thing I know for sure. Grieving stinks. All of a sudden you’re invited to a party you never wanted to attend. But […]
Continue ReadingCondolence letters are one small sliver of what AI can do. Everyone is talking about AI–Artificial Intelligence. The world changed when OpenAI announced the launch of AI ChatGPT. See this link: https://openai.com/ Since ChatGPT, both Google and Microsoft have launched their own variants. Google is called Bard, accessible at this link: https://bard.google.com/ The Microsoft version […]
Continue ReadingEDITORS NOTE: DURING THIS MEMORIAL DAY WEEK, WE ARE RE-POSTING THIS IN HONOR OF ALL THOSE WHO DIED IN THE SERVICE OF THIS NATION. One of the saddest family stories of WWII was the death of the five Sullivan brothers from the USS Juneau in 1942. Below is a their story in brief, and President […]
Continue ReadingCompanioning the bereaved is about being still; it is not about frantic movement forward. “Things come suitable to their time.” Enid Bagnold Many of the messages that people in grief are given are in opposition to stillness… “carry on;” “keep your chin up;” “keep busy;” “I have someone for you to meet.” Yet, the paradox […]
Continue ReadingCompanioning the bereaved means discovering the gifts of sacred silence; it does not mean filling up every moment with words. “Do not speak unless you can improve upon silence.” Buddhist teaching In discovering the gifts of sacred silence, you cultivate what becomes an avenue for the mourner to open his heart up to wisdom surrounding […]
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